Working with children's fears (from work experience). Practical work of a psychologist with children's fears

Children's fears and ways to correct them in children preschool age

Target– Removal of fears in children
Tasks:
1.Develop social trust.
2. Develop inner freedom and looseness.
3. Help in overcoming negative experiences.

Fear - mental condition associated with a pronounced manifestation of asthenic feelings (anxiety, anxiety, etc.) in situations of threat to the biological or social existence of the individual and aimed at a source of real or imagined danger.
Children's fears are a carefully studied topic by psychologists, doctors, teachers, but not fully studied. Children are afraid of injections and dragons, dogs and the giant who lives under the bed, loud noises and moths...
Causes of children's fears: traumatic situation, authoritarian behavior of parents, impressionability, suggestibility, stress, illness. Often, children have situational fears due to an unexpected touch, too loud a sound, a fall, etc.
That the child is afraid testifies the following:
- does not fall asleep alone, does not allow to turn off the light;
- often covers ears with palms;
- hides in a corner, behind a closet;
- refuses to participate in outdoor games;
- does not let mom go away from him;
- sleeps restlessly, screams in a dream;
- often asks for hands;
- does not want to meet and play with other children;
- refuses to communicate with unfamiliar adults who come to the house;
- categorically refuses to accept unfamiliar food.

Verbal and artistic exercises

Theatrical sketches.

An impromptu screen can be built from 2 chairs and a blanket, the characters are toys.
19. Etude A terrible dream.
A boy or a girl goes to bed, and suddenly ... something terrible appears in a dark corner (providence, a wolf „witch, a robot — it is advisable that your child name the character himself). The "monster" must be portrayed as funny as possible. The child doll is afraid, trembles (all emotions must be greatly exaggerated), and then he or with the help of the mother doll turns on the light. And then it turns out that a terrible monster is just a curtain swaying from the wind, or clothes thrown on a chair, or a flower pot on the window ...
20. Etude Thunderstorm
It takes place in the country or in the village. The child-doll goes to bed and just falls asleep, when suddenly a thunderstorm begins. Thunder rumbles, lightning flashes. Thunder is not difficult to convey, and lightning does not have to be shown, just saying it is enough. By the way, pronunciation (and not just demonstration of events and actions on the screen) in therapeutic studies is extremely important. The child-doll is shaking in horror, chattering his teeth, maybe crying. And then he hears someone whining plaintively and scratching at the door. This is a small, cold and frightened puppy. He wants to enter a warm house, but the door does not give in. The “child” feels sorry for the puppy, but on the other hand, it is scary to open the door to the street. For a while, these two feelings struggle in his soul, then compassion wins. He lets the puppy in, calms him down, takes him to his bed, and the puppy falls asleep peacefully. In this sketch, it is important to emphasize that the “child” feels like a noble protector of the weak. It is advisable to find a small toy dog ​​that is noticeably smaller than a baby doll.
You can play these and similar scenes with your child, and if he refuses at first, make him a spectator. The best thing is when adults become spectators, and the child is the only "actor" who plays different roles in turn.
21. Sketch based on a scene from the cartoon "Kitten named Woof."
Invite the child to "go" to the cartoon "Kitten Named Woof." The kitten climbed into the attic during a thunderstorm and sits there alone, trembling with fear. Everything rumbles around, but he does not run away and even invites his friend - the puppy Sharik - to be afraid together. Discuss the actions of the characters, and then act out the scene.
22. The game "Bee in the dark"
“The bee flew from flower to flower (they use chairs of different heights, cabinets, etc.). When the bee flew to the most beautiful flower with large petals, she ate nectar, drank dew and fell asleep inside the flower (a table is used, under which a child climbs). Night fell imperceptibly, and the petals began to close (the table is covered with cloth). The bee woke up, opened her eyes and saw that it was dark around. She remembered that she had stayed inside the flower and decided to sleep until morning. The sun rose, morning came (matter is removed), and the bee again began to have fun, flying from flower to flower.
The game can be repeated by increasing the density of matter, that is, the degree of darkness.
23. Exercise "Swing".
The child sits in the “fetal” position: he raises his knees and lowers his head to them, his feet are firmly pressed to the floor, his hands are clasped around his knees, his eyes are closed. The adult stands behind, puts his hands on the child's shoulders and carefully begins to slowly rock him. The child should not “cling” to the floor with his feet and open his eyes. You can wear an eye patch. The rhythm is slow, the movements are smooth. Do the exercise for 2-3 minutes.
24. "Tumbler" (for children from 6 years old).
Two adults stand at a distance of a meter facing each other, putting their hands forward. Between them stands a child with closed or blindfolded eyes. He is given a command: “Do not take your feet off the floor and boldly fall back!” The outstretched hands pick up the falling person and direct the fall forward, where the child is again met by the outstretched hands of the adult. Such swaying continues for 2-3 minutes, while the amplitude of swaying may increase. Children with strong fears perform the exercise with open eyes, the swing amplitude is initially minimal.
25. The game "In the dark hole"
In the room where the child is, as if by mistake, turn off the light for 3-5 minutes. Invite the child to imagine that he fell into the hole to the mole. A firefly hurries to visit him with his magic lantern. The role of a firefly is chosen by a child who is afraid of the dark. "Firefly" with the help of his magic flashlight (use any pre-prepared flashlight) helps the children to reach the illuminated place.
26. Game "Shadow"
Calm music sounds. Children are divided into pairs: one child is a “traveler”, the other is his “shadow”. "Shadow" tries to accurately copy the movements of the "traveler" who walks around the room, makes different movements, unexpectedly turns, crouches, bends down to “pick a flower”, pick up a “beautiful pebble”, nods his head, jumps on one leg, etc.

Each of us periodically experiences a feeling of anxiety, anxiety and fear - this is one of the aspects of our mental activity. But adults have experience and knowledge that often help to rationalize what is happening and reduce the intensity of experiences. Children do not understand much and experience much more acutely. Often, what frightens a baby may seem like a trifle to an adult. But the feeling of fear makes the child experience really strong emotions that can instantly take over his entire small world.

If the baby complains that he is afraid of something, this is not a reason for ridicule or panic, but rather an occasion to think and talk with the child, try to find out the reason and then decide on further actions. Most children's fears are temporary, with timely detection of fears by adults and the right attitude towards them, they will soon disappear without a trace. There are, of course, such fears (neurotic or obsessive) that impede the normal life of the child, interfere with his development and adaptation, and apply to all areas of life - in this case, it is better to seek help from specialists.

What are childhood fears?

Fear is a feeling that arises in response to the impact of threatening factors, which is based on the innate instinct of self-preservation. Psychologists identify two basic threats that cause a feeling of fear - threats to life and human life values. The specificity of children's fears lies in the fact that, as a rule, they are not directly related to the actual threat. Children's fears are based on information that children receive from nearby adults and pass through the prism of their vivid fantasy and imagination.

Causes of children's fears

The most obvious cause of children's fears is a traumatic situation experienced earlier. For example, if a child is bitten by a dog, there is a good chance that he will be afraid of dogs in the future. If parents intimidate the baby with fairy tale characters in an attempt to achieve their own goals, the child may be afraid to be alone or in the dark. The basis for the formation of fears is also the general anxiety of the immediate environment, which broadcasts to the child a huge number of prohibitions and a setting for failure. Mothers and grandmothers often warn children with phrases: “Caution! Otherwise, you will fall, hurt yourself, break your leg.” Of these phrases, the child, as a rule, perceives only the second part. He does not yet fully understand what he is being warned against, but he is filled with a feeling of anxiety, which can develop into persistent fears. Excessively emotional discussion by adults of various incidents and natural disasters, focusing on the fact that danger can lie in wait at every step also does not go unnoticed by children and is a fertile ground for fears.

There are not so obvious reasons that may underlie children's fears:

1. Overprotection
   Children living in a modern metropolis are often subject to excessive guardianship from their parents, they constantly hear that danger awaits them at every corner. This makes babies insecure and fearful. In addition, life itself in a big city is filled with stress and very intense, which cannot but affect the child's psyche in general, making it more vulnerable.
2. Lack of parental attention
   Due to the excessive workload of adults, their communication with children is often very limited in time. Live emotional communication is being replaced by computer games and television programs. Therefore, it is necessary to communicate qualitatively with the child at least a few hours a week, take joint walks, play, and discuss significant moments.
3. Lack of physical activity
   Absence enough physical activity can also cause anxiety.
4. Mother's aggression towards the child
   If the mother in the family system occupies a leading position and often allows herself to show aggression towards other family members, the emergence of fears in the child is almost inevitable. She is not perceived by the baby as an object that will protect and come to the rescue in any situation, so the basic sense of security suffers.
5. Unstable family environment
   An unstable emotional situation in the family, frequent scandals between family members, lack of mutual understanding and support become the cause of chronic anxiety experienced by the child while in the family. Over time, this can lead to fear.
6. The presence of psychological and mental disorders in the child
   Also, the cause of fear may be the presence of a neurosis in a child, the diagnosis and treatment of which is within the competence of medical workers. A manifestation of neurosis is children's fears that are not characteristic of the age at which the child is, or correspond to his age, but acquire a pathological manifestation.

Types of children's fears

There are three types of fears:

1. obsessive fears
   These fears the child experiences under certain circumstances that can cause him to panic. For example, fear of heights, open spaces, crowded places, etc.
2. delusional fears
   The presence of such fears indicates serious problems in the psyche of the child. Their cause cannot be found and cannot be explained logically. For example, a child is afraid to play with a certain toy, wear certain clothes, open an umbrella, etc. But, if you find such a fear in your baby, you should not immediately panic, you should try to find out the reason, perhaps he does not want to play with a certain toy due to objective reasons. For example, he could hit hard or fall painfully when he used to play with this toy.
3. Overvalued fears
   These fears are products of the child's fantasy, they are encountered in 90% of cases when working with children. At first, such fears are related to a certain life situation, but then they take over the child's thoughts so much that he cannot think of anything else. For example, the fear of darkness, which in the children's imagination is "teeming with scary monsters."

Age-related childhood fears

Psychologists identify children's fears that manifest themselves in a certain age period, are considered the norm, and eventually disappear with normal development.

• 0-6 months - Fear is caused by the unexpected loud sounds, sudden movements, falling objects; absence of mother, and sudden changes in her mood, total loss support;
• 7-12 months - loud noises can cause fear; people whom the child sees for the first time; changing clothes; abrupt change of scenery; height; a drain hole in the bathroom or pool, helplessness in the face of an unexpected situation;
• 1-2 years - loud noises can cause fear; separation from parents; falling asleep and waking up bad dreams; strangers; bathtub or pool drain hole; fear of injury; loss of control over emotional and physical functions;
• 2–2.5 years - fear of losing parents, emotional rejection on their part; unfamiliar children of the same age; percussion sounds; the appearance of nightmares is possible; changes in the environment; manifestations of the elements - thunder, lightning, downpour;
• 2-3 years - large, incomprehensible, "carrying a threat", objects, for example, a washing machine; change in the usual way of life, emergency events (death, divorce, etc.); changes in the location of familiar objects;
• 3-5 years - death (the understanding comes that life is finite); nightmares; robbery attacks; natural disasters; fire; illness and surgery; snakes;
• 6-7 years old - fairy-tale characters (witches, ghosts); fear of loss (to get lost or lose mom and dad), loneliness; fear of not meeting the expectations of parents in school, fears associated with the school; fear of physical violence;
• 7-8 years old - dark ominous places (basement, closet), natural disasters and catastrophes, loss of attention and acceptance, love from others (peers, teachers, parents); fear of being late for school, exclusion from school and home life; physical punishment; lack of acceptance at school;
• 8-9 years - failure in games, at school; conviction of lying or undesirable behavior; fear of physical violence; fear of losing parents, quarrels with parents;
• 9-11 years - the inability to achieve success in school or in sports; illness; certain animals; height, whirling (some carousels can cause fear); people who carry a threat (drug addicts, hooligans, drunkards, etc.);
• 11-13 years old - defeat; unusual own actions; own appearance and attractiveness; sickness and death; sexual violence; criticism from adults; own insolvency; loss of personal items.

How to deal with childhood fears

Children's fears, which adults do not pay attention to, can result in negative consequences, such as problems in communicating with peers, aggressiveness, difficulties in social adaptation, neuroses and complexes. Therefore, it is important for adults to pay attention to the child's fears in time, to understand whether they have pathological character, and, depending on this, try to help the child on your own or seek help from a specialist.

For questions about children's fears, you can contact a psychologist on the portal "I am a parent" in the section "For parents" - "Question to a psychologist".

consultation qualified specialists for all exciting questions, including a psychologist on children's fears, children and parents can be obtained from the Unified All-Russian Helpline.

The first step in helping is identifying fear. This can be done during confidential conversation with the child. You can ask the child if he is afraid of specific things. This becomes appropriate only if the child has already reached the age of three years. The parent can gently and slowly question the child about fears, without focusing on any of them, so as not to lead to fixation and suggestion. During the conversation, encourage and praise the baby. If fear is detected, react calmly and confidently, because the child reads your emotional state. So, if a child's fear frightens an adult, the child may experience even more. Ask the child to describe the fear, what it looks like, what he feels, in what situations the feeling of fear comes to him, and what the baby would like to do with it. As a rule, children happily agree to send it to North Pole, lock in high tower etc.

Another effective method is to compose a fairy tale about fear together with the baby, which must certainly end with the victory of the protagonist over fear.

- exciting and useful activity. While drawing, you can have a conversation, ask the child about his fear and invite him to look for solutions. And upon completion of drawing fear, the sheet with the drawing can be burned, explaining to the baby that in this way you burn his fear along with the drawing, and he will not bother him anymore. Burning must be carried out in the form of a kind of ritual, constantly encouraging and praising the baby for how brave he is, focusing on how well he dealt with fear.

Great for dealing with fears dramatization or play- it is worth noting that the use of this method is widely used by psychologists. Children in the group come up with stories about their fears and, with the help of a psychologist, play the stories in the group. Further, parents can play the situation with the child again at home, but only if this does not cause him negativity.

It is important to remember that fears are inherent in everyone, and they should not be afraid. It is important for parents to learn to accept their children as they are, with all their fears and anxieties. After all, if a confident, reliable and accepting parent is nearby, it becomes a matter of time for a child to overcome fear. All that is required of mom and dad in overcoming children's fears is to be close to the child, be able to listen to him, identify the baby's fear in time, and find The right way dealing with this fear: on your own or with the help of a specialist.

Maria Merolaeva

Childhood fears is a feeling of unease or anxiety felt by children as a response to a real or imagined threat to their livelihoods or well-being. More often, the occurrence of such fears in children occurs as a result of the influence of the psychological nature of adults, mainly parents, or self-hypnosis. However, children's fears should not be taken unambiguously as unhealthy emotions. After all, any emotion plays a certain role and helps individuals navigate the social and objective environment that surrounds them. So, for example, it protects against excessive risk in a mountain hike. This emotion controls activity, behavioral reactions, leads the individual away from dangerous situations, the possibility of injury. This is the defense mechanism of fears. They take part in the instinctive behavioral reactions of the individual, while ensuring his self-preservation.

Causes of children's fears

Every individual has experienced fear at least once in their life. Fear acts as the strongest emotion and is the result of the instinct of self-preservation.

Factors contributing to the emergence of fear can be a variety of phenomena: from loud knocking to threats of physical violence. Fear is considered a natural feeling when a dangerous situation arises. However, many babies feel fears of a different nature more often than there is reason for this.

Children's fears and their psychology lies in the reasons provoking negative emotions. In infancy, fears are primarily associated with a feeling of loneliness, as a result of which the child cries and longs for the presence of the mother. Toddlers can be frightened by sharp sounds, the sudden appearance of a stranger, etc. If a large object approaches the baby, then he demonstrates fear. By the age of two or three, the baby may dream scary dreams which can lead to fear of falling asleep. Mostly, fears in this age period are due to instincts. Such fears are protective in nature.

The period of life of babies from three to five years is characterized by fear of the dark, some fairy-tale characters, closed space. They are afraid of loneliness, so they do not want to be alone. Growing up, children begin to experience fears associated, for the most part, with death. They may fear for their own lives, their parents.

In the younger school age period, fears acquire a social connotation. Here the leading feeling may be the fear of inconsistency. Coming to school, the parent child finds himself in a completely new environment for him and changes his own social position, which leads to the acquisition of many social roles and therefore with them comes many fears. In addition, in this age period, fears of a mystical orientation arise. Children expand their horizons due to their interest in everything otherworldly. They are fond of watching mystical films, closing their eyes while showing especially scary moments. Toddlers scare each other with “horror stories” or scary stories like black hand stories.

As children grow older, the area of ​​​​fears expands. In puberty, the number of fears of inconsistency increases. Adolescents are afraid of non-recognition from their peers and adults, they are afraid of the physical changes that occur to them. For them, self-doubt, underestimation of self-esteem becomes characteristic. Therefore, adolescents need to protect their psychological orientation more than others, since in the puberty period, against the background of neurotic states, the long-term unresolved experiences that have arisen lead to the emergence of new or aggravation of existing fears. The child's traumatic experience also contributes to this. So, for example, children can witness real violence, feel physical pain themselves. Teenagers are afraid of losing control over their own feelings and actions. Such fears can be called neurotic.

However, the most dangerous form of fears are pathological fears. The result of their occurrence may be the acquisition by children of certain dangerous consequences, such as neurotic tics, sleep disorder, obsessive movements, difficulties in communicating with others, or anxiety, lack of attention, etc. It is this form of fear that can provoke the occurrence of quite serious mental illnesses.

Based on the foregoing, it should be concluded that various fears, fears and experiences are an integral part of children's lives. Therefore, the problem of children's fears should be solved by parents by mastering the necessary skills that help to cope with the natural fears of children. For this purpose, it is necessary to understand the main factors that provoke the emergence of fear. All of them have a connection with upbringing in the family, since the formation of a child's personality takes place in the family. Therefore, it is from it that children endure their own fears.

The first and most important factor is closely related to the behavior of parents. Mom and dad of the baby unconsciously or consciously form fear in him through their attitude to the surrounding reality and behavior. So, for example, situations where parents invariably seek to isolate their child from the world and its negative impact only contribute to the fact that the child is constantly under stress. By their behavior, parents develop in the crumbs a sense of steady danger emanating from the world. And since while the baby is small, he strives to imitate significant adults in everything, therefore, if members of his family are characterized by constant anxiety, then he will learn it.

The second factor has a connection with the traditions and foundations that prevail in the family. Any family conflicts frighten the child. After all, being born, the baby brings harmony with him. Therefore, he expects from the most native harmonious relations. If conflict situations are of an aggressive nature, then children can be quite frightened, which will subsequently lead to the appearance of neuroses in the event of similar situations. are also born as a result of the presentation of excessively high demands by parents. They constantly have to justify inflated parental expectations, which leads to increased anxiety in children.

In cases where the family is dominated authoritarian style behavior, the child will be constantly kept in the system of minor and major fears. In the life of such a baby, everything shifts in one direction - the correctness or incorrectness of his actions from the point of view of the wishes of his parents. Such children are more nervous in comparison with their peers and shy. A stable state of anxiety leads to the formation of new fears. In cases where violent influences are applied to babies, children will experience the appearance of a whole bunch of fears. The third factor is interconnected with disturbed, inharmonious communication with peers. Children in the process of communication interaction often offend each other, make excessive demands on their peers. This creates an atmosphere of increased nervousness and is a condition that provokes the emergence of fears in some children.

Diagnosis of children's fears

In order to diagnose fears, you need to understand that there are different kinds children's fears. Fear can be real when the innate instinct for self-preservation is manifested due to exposure to external danger.

Fear is neurotic. This type is associated with a mental disorder. The state of constant timid expectation that appears at different moments that are not related to a specific situation or object is called free fear. It is today the problem of children's fears worries almost every parent. Therefore, an important factor in the work of a psychologist is diagnosing children's fears and identifying the causes. Absolutely any method of diagnosing fears in children aims to discover not only varieties psychological illness but also the reason that caused it.

Some psychologists use drawing to solve the problem of diagnosing children's fears, others can use modeling, and still others choose to talk with children. Pretty hard to define best practice for diagnosing fears, because all these methods give equally effective results. When choosing a methodology, one should take into account a whole range of individual psychological characteristics and age traits of each crumb.

In the classification of children's fears, two main forms can be distinguished: mute and "invisible" fears. Silent fears consist in the denial by the baby of the presence of fears, but for parents, the existence of such fears is obvious. These include the fear of animals, strangers, unfamiliar surroundings or loud noises.

Fears - "invisible" are the exact opposite of silent fears. Here the child is fully aware of his own fears, but his parents do not see any symptoms of their presence in the baby. Invisible fears are considered more common. Below are the most common. Many children are afraid of punishment as a result of committing some misconduct. At the same time, their mistake can be completely insignificant and parents will not even pay attention to it. The presence of such fear in children indicates the presence of serious problems in communicative interaction with parents, violations in relationships with them. Such fears can often be the result of overly strict treatment of children. If a child is diagnosed given form fear, then this is an occasion for parents to seriously think about their own model of upbringing and their behavior with the child, otherwise such upbringing can lead to serious consequences.

Often children are afraid of the sight of blood. Often, babies experience panic at the sight of a tiny drop of blood. Do not laugh at such a reaction. The horror of the test children before the blood is most often due to the usual ignorance in terms of physiology. The child thinks that all the blood can flow out of him, as a result of which he will die. Another common childhood fear is the fear of the death of parents. Often this fear is generated by parents.

Children's fears and their psychology is such that even if children do not show anxiety or parents do not notice the presence of such in babies, this does not mean that they have no fears. various etiologies and forms.

It is also possible to diagnose fears with the help of specially developed methods, such as the Phillips or Temple school anxiety test, various projective methods, the Spielberger method, etc. Panfilova.

Children's courage and fear

Overcoming fear is considered one of the most significant challenges that children have ever faced. Fear is one of the greatest enemies of the child's psyche. And courage is a quality of character that can be developed. The need for fear is determined by the instinct of self-preservation. However, most children's fears gradually go beyond the boundaries of simple self-preservation. Children are afraid to change something, to look ridiculous, to be different from everyone else. In other words, gradually this emotion subjugates the lives of children. From a quality that was originally designed to benefit the individual, it is transformed into a ballast that hinders movement and a successful life.

Fear is the source of anxiety. Often, as an emotion, in depth and scale, it becomes much larger in comparison with the danger itself. Children are afraid of something, which later turns out to be less harmful than the feeling of fear.

Every individual on earth is afraid of something, but this does not mean that there are no brave people. After all, courage does not manifest itself in the absence of fear, it is expressed in the ability to take control over it. Therefore, the problem does not lie only in the fear itself, it is contained in the understanding of what contributes to its overcoming and control over it. A child with courage is able to overcome his own fears.

Fear does not depend on age and gender. Numerous studies show that in the preschool period, fears are most effectively subjected to psychological correction, since they are mostly of a transient nature. Fears at this age are due to emotions to a greater extent than character.

Many fears in puberty are the result of prior fears and anxieties. As a result, the sooner you start working in the direction of preventing fears, the greater the likelihood of their absence in puberty. If psychological correction is carried out in the preschool age period, then the result will be the prevention of the formation of psychasthenic character traits and neuroses in adolescents.

Children's fears often disappear without a trace, provided that they are treated correctly and the reasons that provoke their occurrence are understood. In cases where they are painfully accentuated or persist for a long time, we can talk about the physical weakening and nervous exhaustion of the baby, the wrong behavior of the parents and the presence of conflict relationships in the family.

In order to help with children's fears, the child's immediate environment should be worked out - as soon as external frustrating factors are eliminated, his emotional state automatically normalizes. Therefore, working with parents is considered the most effective initial method of corrective work with fears. Indeed, often adults themselves are afraid of something, thereby instilling their fears in children.

Courage and fear are two reactions of the child that can be controlled by them. Courage is considered quite an important and necessary character trait. After all, it is courage that contributes to making the right decision, while fear advises doing everything in a different way. Courage helps not to be afraid of the future, not afraid of change and calmly face the truth. Brave children can move mountains. To develop and nurture courage in a baby is the primary task of parents.

For the formation of courage in kids, one should not constantly scold them for all sorts of trifles. You need to try to find moments for which they are worth praising. You can't call a child a coward. It is necessary to try as simply and intelligibly as possible to explain to the baby that fear is a normal human reaction. To teach children to stop being afraid, they should be taught to deal with their fears. And for this it is necessary to sow in children the confidence that their parents will always support them in their struggle. The best weapon against fear is laughter. Therefore, parents need to present a frightening phenomenon in a funny way. For example, you can come up with a fabulous humorous story about a baby who was able to overcome fear. It is not recommended for children to entrust what they, due to their age or characteristics, are simply not able to do. Excessive guardianship can contribute to the development of timidity, fearfulness and even cowardice in children.

Correction of children's fears

Working with children's fears is characterized by specificity, since children can rarely formulate their request for help on their own, when they are afraid of something, they are not able to clearly explain what frightens them. Therefore, for a successful psycho-corrective impact of children's fears, one should first understand what specifically frightens the child - the invented Baba Yaga or the fear of the dark, the fear of loneliness. To this end, you can invite the baby to draw what scares him. A drawing can show a lot of what worries or scares the baby. However, this method will not always be relevant, since children may simply refuse to draw. Their refusal may be due to the fact that he does not want to this moment draw or just not ready to open up. Also, children may be afraid that they will be laughed at. You have to be ready for rejection. In such cases, parents can try to draw their childhood fears and tell their children about them. This will be a good example for kids. However, if the child still does not want to, you should not insist. After all, the purpose of this method is to bring fears to the surface, and not to force the child to close and be left alone with their own fears and fears. The main task in correcting any fears is to bring them to light.

If, nevertheless, the kid painted his fear, then you need to teach him how to deal with it. And in this case, the ridicule of fear will be the best. After all, any fears are afraid of ridicule. You can add funny ears, mustaches, pigtails, a crochet nose, flowers and more to him. The most important thing is that the child himself did it. Let him suggest what should be done. You can also try to somehow beat the fear. For example, a child drew a very scary Baba Yaga, you can invite him to draw next to how she fell into a puddle. That is, you need to make sure that the frightening image is in an absurd or funny situation.

Working with children's fears may include group and whisper therapy.

The main thing to remember is that you should not mock children, you should not dismiss their fears, you should not call children cowards. The kid needs to be helped to understand that fear is a natural reaction of the body, that adults are also sometimes afraid of something, they just learned to take control of fears.

It is also not recommended to arrange courage training for children, especially very young ones. So, for example, if children are afraid of the dark, then at night you need to leave a nightlight turned on or an ajar door to a neighboring lighted room. After all, the nature of fear is irrational, often a person understands that there is nothing to be afraid of, but when he gets into a situation that frightens him, he begins to panic.

All kinds of children's fears can be quite successfully corrected, provided that the parents understand the problem, their competent support for the kids and the presence next to the child when he is afraid of something.

How to deal with childhood fears

The natural and most effective way to overcome and deal with children's fears is the game. Psychologists have established the fact that children experience less fears, being more surrounded by peers. It's so natural when a baby is surrounded by a whole bunch of kids. And when the children are together, what do they do? Of course they play. The observations of psychologists have shown that the game process can provide serious support in the fight against children's fears. Children need to be able to openly and freely express their feelings. Indeed, very often in life there are social restrictions, certain norms of behavior, rules of decency and many other prescriptions that must be followed. The result of this is that the baby does not have the opportunity for self-expression, which may result in the appearance of fears. Of course, there are other factors that provoke the emergence of children's fears, but more often than not, fears arise as a result of parental suggestions and their wrong actions.

So, what should children's games be based on to eliminate fear? First of all, it depends on the specifics of the fears felt by the child. However, there are recommendations general which can help children with any kind of fears. Games should teach children to adequately perceive their own emotions, their awareness, relieve excessive tension, emotional release and release of hormones released during fear. Play therapy should be carried out with other methods in combination. It should contribute to the activation of psychological processes and create a positive attitude. Children should be praised while playing.

Outdoor games are also aimed at overcoming children's fears. So, for example, the fear of loneliness can be successfully corrected with the help of a collective game of hide and seek. If the baby is afraid of the dark, then you can use games like searching for treasure or treasures, the main component of which will be darkness. You can not turn off the light completely, but dim it a little.

Psychologists also advise parents to become "wizards". This means that adults are encouraged to come up with some set of phrases that will mean a spell that drives away or eliminates a frightening object.

However, the fight against fears is better to prefer the prevention of their occurrence. Prevention of children's fears is the observance of a number of simple rules by parents. You can't scare kids on purpose. Also, do not allow others to scare babies. If you do not tell the children about the babayka who will take them away in case bad behavior then they will never know about it. You should not be afraid of a doctor who will give an injection if the child does not eat porridge. You need to understand that words, even casually thrown, can soon develop into real fear.

It is also not recommended to tell children or discuss various scary stories with them. After all, they often do not understand most of what is told, but they put together a picture of the pieces, which in the future will become the source of their fears.

Parents should supervise their children's TV viewing time. The TV should not work as a background during the day, as the child can focus on things that are absolutely unnecessary for him.

No need to impose your own fears on kids. Children do not need to know that you are afraid of mice, spiders or other insects. Even if, by chance, seeing a mouse, the parent experiences panic horror and wants to squeal loudly, then with the child, by all means, you need to try to restrain yourself.

A family for a baby is a reliable rear and protection. Therefore, he must feel family relationships protected. He must understand and feel that his parents are strong personalities, self-confident, able to protect themselves and him. It is important for a kid to understand that he is loved and even if he commits some kind of misconduct, he will not be given to some uncle (for example, a policeman or a woman).

The best means of preventing fears for children is mutual understanding between parents and their babies. Since for the calm of the child, the development of uniform rules of behavior by all adults involved in education plays an essential role. Otherwise, the baby will not be able to figure out what actions can be performed and which cannot.

The ideal option in the prevention of fears is the participation of the father in games, his presence, for example, when the baby takes the first steps. After all, as a rule, dads react more calmly to inevitable falls.

So that the child is not afraid of the dark, you should be with him until the age of 5 when he falls asleep. It is recommended to go to bed no later than 10 pm.

Children should not be forbidden to be afraid or scold them if they are afraid of something. Parents should understand that children's fear is not a manifestation of weakness, harmfulness or stubbornness. It is also not recommended to ignore fears. Since they are unlikely to disappear on their own.

As a rule, if the baby is surrounded by self-confident adults, a calm and stable environment and harmony reigns in the family, then children's fears disappear with age without any consequences.

Prevention of children's fears should be carried out from the moment the expectant mother found out about the pregnancy. After all, the baby is going through all the stressful situations together with the mother. That is why it is very important to find a pregnant woman in a benevolent and harmonious atmosphere, where there is no place for anxiety and fears.

Fear is a very unpleasant and powerful emotion. Every adult knows this for himself. Therefore, many parents are afraid of the fears of their children (especially if they are not fleeting) and try to save their beloved child from such experiences. Are they right? It is difficult to answer this question unambiguously. So that you can develop one or another attitude towards the fears of your child, let's first consider the functions of fear, its types and causes.

Fear is an emotion that all living beings experience from time to time. So is it really a cruel joke of nature that endowed us with this ability? Of course not. After all, fear has a protective character, it is a direct consequence of the instinct of self-preservation. Imagine for a moment that your child is completely unaware of fear: he boldly climbs onto the roof, puts his fingers in the socket, runs across the road on a busy highway, etc. (and such "fearlessness" does happen with some mental illnesses). Agree scary picture! So before you roll up your sleeves to deal with fears, consider whether there is a natural protective component in your child's fear that it protects him from. If you identify such a factor, then the goal of working with your son or daughter will be not so much the disappearance of fear, but the return of it to the "quantitative framework".

In addition, parents need to be aware of age dynamics of fears . Then they will understand that fears like others mental manifestations, may reflect the child's achievement of a certain level of development. So, for example, if a child at seven months is afraid of being left without a mother, and at eight months he is afraid of strangers, then you should not fight this, but rejoice, because this indicates his emotional attachment to his mother and the ability to distinguish her from strangers. So parents, on the contrary, should be worried if they do not observe such anxiety in their baby. However, if the child has not “outgrown” such fears even at the age of one and a half, then this may indicate violations of his relationship with his mother or developmental disabilities.

Consider the fears that are typical for the development of children of other age categories (that is, those fears that most children have at this age and are normal, although if you feel their tendency to repeat, then you should immediately work them out with game methods).

One to three years the child may be afraid of unexpected sharp sounds (due to instinct), loneliness, loss of emotional contact with the mother (especially when visiting a nursery), pain, injections and health workers. During this period, children sometimes begin to have terrible dreams (often with fairy-tale characters), so fears of falling asleep may appear.

Aged three to five years possible fears of loneliness, darkness and confined space. Fairy tale characters, frightening before a child only in a dream, now they can make him fear during the day.

Five to seven years old you can observe the emergence of fear of devils or other representatives of the other world. Like many other fears, it is a kind of the most important, leading fear that appears at this age - the fear of death (of one's own and of one's parents).

At primary school age seven to eleven years old ) the fear of not meeting the requirements of the social environment, of not being the one loved and appreciated by parents, teachers, and peers becomes the leader. Many small “fears” already follow from this global fear: fear of making a mistake, fear of being late for a lesson, etc. In addition, children of this age are characterized by magical thinking, so they begin to fear mysterious phenomena, predictions, superstitions. This is the age of children's horror stories and chilling stories with which the guys are happy to scare each other.

Eleven to sixteen years old , that is, in adolescence, children's fears change, as do developmental tasks. Adolescents are afraid of physical changes happening to them, afraid of not being themselves, afraid of becoming impersonal, afraid of losing power over their feelings. At the same time, they are afraid of loneliness, punishment, rejection by their peers, not being able to cope with their obligations. Natural fears (based on the instinct of self-preservation) also do not disappear. They are transformed into fear of war, fire, disaster, fear of getting sick. Add to this impressive list of previously acquired and not completely outlived fears, and you will feel that adolescence is problematic not only for parents, but also for the children themselves.

The reasons for the emergence of fear can be a variety of circumstances:

Really traumatic experience received by a child (for example, a dog bite);
- normal growing up (this is how, for example, the natural fear of death appears);
- disruption of relationship with parents ;
- mental illness ;
- other feelings and desires who hide behind fear, like behind a mask (for example, a child is afraid to be alone). Such fear can be true, or it can serve as an instrument of influence on parents, control of their lives.

Understand hidden reasons until the end only a specialist in this field can do it. It is more important for parents to take into account the factors that contribute to the emergence of fears.

Firstly, overprotection . If parents try to protect the child from all troubles, anticipate all difficulties, worry about him, then, accordingly, the child begins to perceive the world as incomprehensible, alien and threatening with dangers.

Secondly, adult conversations about illness and misfortune . If the adults in the family are prone to pessimism and see life primarily as troubles and difficulties (which is expressed in frequent conversations about misfortunes and illnesses, both their own and others), then, naturally, they will not teach their child cheerfulness. After all, small children perceive Big world through the prism of the views of their parents, and in this case the resulting image does not bode well.

Thirdly, excessive tension and misunderstanding in the family . If conflicts often arise in the family or tension and misunderstanding between family members are felt, then this directly affects the emotional well-being of the child, including the strength and number of fears that arise. The same applies to the situation of divorce of parents.

Fourth, parents' lack of confidence in their educational actions . If parents behave too gently, all the time doubting the correctness of their actions in relation to their son or daughter, then this also adversely affects his (her) development. For the psychological well-being of children, it is necessary that parents be a kind of fortress that confidently limits the scope of freedom and at the same time it provides protection. Otherwise, the child has internal "limiters" in the form of fears.

Fifth, lack of communication with peers . In children who have the opportunity to play with peers, fears rarely go to the pathological level. This is probably due to the fact that in joint games, children of the same age involuntarily turn to the topic of the most relevant fear for them and thus give vent to their emotions and at the same time receive group support.

So before you start working directly to reduce (or eliminate) the fears of your son or daughter, try to identify all the circumstances that may influence the occurrence of this emotion, and take appropriate measures to change them.

If you have already taken care of this, then you can move on to special ways of working with fears.

Let's make a reservation right away that the game methods given in this article will help you cope with the natural (ordinary) fears of children. If fear is already expressed at a pathological level, that is, it takes extreme forms (the child is completely unable to control it, this emotion adversely affects the character, interferes with normal relationships with other people, does not allow one to adapt well to social conditions, etc.) , then it is better to consult a professional psychologist, and possibly a child psychiatrist.

Generally play (and its counterparts such as drawing and fantasy) gives the child an excellent opportunity to master his fear. In the game, every little coward is able to experience his fear again, as if for fun, and thus reduce the severity of the experience. In the game, nothing prevents the child from imagining that he is brave and strong, capable of defeating any enemy (external or internal). When playing, it is easy to portray the image of fear itself, and then from the "master" of the child, he will gradually turn into his servant (or at least partner). In the game, this fear can be changed by adding bright, warm colors or comic details to the image. You can even make your fear very small and feel sorry for it.

In a word, in dealing with this problem, the game provides a lot of opportunities, and all these methods are completely natural for the child. That is why it is possible to use not even special psycho-corrective games, but folk fun games that do an excellent job of reducing various children's fears and preventing them. You will see this for yourself by analyzing the following few games.

Fifteen

it old game, which has come down to our days. Perhaps because, in addition to joy, it brings tangible benefits to children, carrying out, one might say, the prevention of fear of attacks, injections and physical punishment.

Arrange chairs and tables around the room. The driver must taunt the player by slapping him on the back or a little lower. At the same time, he does not have the right to reach the player through a chair or other furniture. Try to "stain" the children (or the child) not just symbolically, but by slapping perceptibly.

Note. During the game chase, it is useful (and also fun) for the host to shout out phrases like: "Well, wait a minute!", "You'll get it from me!", "I'll catch up and eat!" - and similar threats, which, of course, are comic, but will help the child get rid of the fear of unexpected impact and fear of punishment in real life.

Zhmurki

As you probably guess, this folk game helps the child cope with the fears of the dark and confined spaces. Its rules are known to everyone, but if you play indoors, then it is better to make some adjustments to them.

Blindfold the child who plays the role of the driver. You can spin it a little to make it more difficult to navigate in space, but this is not recommended for very anxious children and those who experience intense fear darkness. After that, the players should disperse in different directions. When the driver shouts: "Freeze!" - they should stop at the places where they ended up and not move anywhere. The task of the driver is to find all the participants. If this process is delayed, then you can help him in this way: all the players who are not caught begin to clap their hands at the same time. In the next horse, the one who was found before everyone else becomes the driver.

Note. So that the game does not become boring, with its subsequent repetitions, you can complicate the conditions by placing barriers in the room from chairs and tables. If you are playing together with a child, then it is better to do it right away, and to maintain the excitement of the game, make sounds from time to time (for example, "Ha!", "Wow!", etc.). The driver’s task will not become more primitive from this (after all, he will not only have to approach you, but do it, bypassing the labyrinth of obstacles).

hide and seek

The corrective value of this folk game is the same as the previous one. At the same time, it helps to cope to some extent with the fear of loneliness, since the hidden child remains alone for some time.

The rules of this traditional game are simple and known to everyone, so we will not dwell on them. But the conditions that make this fun more effective in the fight against fears should be discussed separately.

If your child is afraid of the dark, then you can turn off (or at least initially dim) the light in the room, leave it only in the corridor, where there are no convenient "secret" places. Explain this by saying that it is much more difficult to find a person in a dimly lit room than in a brightly lit one. If a child is driving, try to hide in dark room so that he was forced to look there in search of a player. If you yourself are the driver, then try to make the child want to hide in an unlit room. To do this, when you go in search of a child, look into the dark part of the apartment and portray fear and horror that you are afraid and will not go there for anything. Keep thinking out loud that your son (daughter), of course, will never dare to hide there, in general, you don’t need to overcome your fear. Your child will not really torment his beloved dad (mother) like that, forcing him to enter a scary room! Continue to lament in the same spirit. Then after some time your baby will certainly want to "torment" his cowardly parent by hiding in a dark room. After all, children love to fight with other people's shortcomings, and even more so with their parents.

Note. When you find a child in the role of a driver, do not forget to express great joy about the loss found. This emotional reinforcement will come in handy and will reward the baby for those efforts in control. own feelings, which he attached (after all, he had to sit quietly, perhaps in an uncomfortable position, alone in a dark room, or maybe in an enclosed space such as a closet or bathroom).

All three of the above games are suitable for children from two years old, and for older ones. Interest in them fades only towards the end of primary school age, that is, they are extremely universal.

But the games, to the description of which we turn, can be used to work with fears in children of a certain age and level of development. So before applying them, try to match the requirements of a particular game with individual characteristics your child.

"Quick Answers to Stupid Questions"

The main feature of this game is speed. Time constraints create a stressful situation (albeit a joke). Therefore, if your child is afraid of not being on time and being late (for example, to school, to classes, on an excursion, to finish test etc.), then be sure to periodically play this game with him.

Take the ball. The driver throws the ball to the player and asks various "stupid" questions. When the child has the ball, the driver immediately begins to count out loud: one, two, three. If up to three the player does not answer anything, then he does not count a point. The one with the most points wins.

If you play together with a child, then you can agree on the following condition: the child wins if he scored at least five points out of ten possible, that is, he answered five questions out of ten. Immediately explain to the child that there is no need to look for serious or scientific answers, let him say what comes to mind, the main thing is that the answer fits the topic and is not a clear lie. So, if the driver asks: "Why does the heron have long legs?" - then the player can answer: "So that the stomach does not soak!" or "Because he lives in a swamp." To the question: "How far is it to Mars?" there may be such answers: "No further than from Mars to the Earth", "You can't get there on foot", etc.

Note. This game not only develops the ability to act quickly in a stressful situation, but also contributes to the development of speech, ingenuity and creative thinking.

"Narrative Thread"

Children usually love this game, as it is a joint activity with adults. As you know, the monologue in children is less developed than the dialogue, so they are happy to involve other participants in compiling a common story.

Take a ball of thick thread or braid. Think of the beginning of a story about a child who was afraid of something. For example, this: "The boy Petya lived in the world. He was kind and smart. He had loving parents. Probably, everything with Petya would be fine if it were not for his fears. And he was afraid ..." In these words, pass the ball child, leaving the end of the thread in his hand. The child must continue the story and endow Petya with some fears. Most likely, these will be the fears of the child himself or those that he has long experienced.

Sometimes children come up with completely fearless fears, which makes the story comedy. This is also a good option, because from laughing at small fears to being ironic about your real fears is one step and it will be done over time. The further course of the game assumes that the participant holding the ball logically continues the overall story, influencing the course of the plot. The thread remaining in the hands of the players shows how many circles the ball has described. If there are already too many such thread layers, then try to bring the story to an end (preferably a happy one) on your own. If a happy ending does not work out, then promise the child to continue inventing stories about Petya next time, maybe he will be more lucky in them.

Note. In this game, your child gets the opportunity to openly talk about his fears and other experiences, remaining in perfect safety, because it's not about him, but about coward Petya. You also have complete freedom for creativity and can turn the plot in the right direction, give indirect support to the child (that is, Petya), show that you believe in his strength and circumstances will certainly arise in which Petya will excel, show what he is capable of really.

"Portrait of my fear"

Children often find it difficult to draw their fear. Sometimes this feeling is so strong that it seems simply unthinkable for a child to take and reflect on paper all the horrors that torment his soul. In these cases, he may refuse to draw. Difficulties may also arise for other reasons: if a child is ashamed of his fear, does not want to admit it, let alone advertise it. Such children usually claim that they are not afraid of anything, and offer to draw on a different topic.

Do not be embarrassed by such resistance of the child, this is a manifestation of natural defense mechanisms psyche. You don’t need to break them either, just try to create an atmosphere for the child that is safe for his self-esteem and self-respect. Suggest, for example, to draw something that he was afraid of when he was little. Or let him portray what all children are usually afraid of. If your son or daughter admits their fears, but is afraid to portray them, then you will have to set an example for him (her). Then draw your own fears (which, by the way, is very useful for adults), discuss them with your child. Then next time, maybe he will want to deal with "his dragons."

Let's pretend that scary picture nevertheless appeared with the filing of your child. This is already the first stage of overcoming fear, and the young artist coped with it! Do not forget to praise him for this, emphasizing that it takes special courage to draw your fears. Now talk about what is drawn. Be interested in everything: what fear wants, how it can influence the child, where he lives, who can defeat him, who the fear is angry at, what he doesn’t like, what he is for, etc. You can even try to act out a dialogue between a coward and his fear, where both roles (but sitting on different chairs) will be played by the child himself. In the process of this dialogue, you can guess about the internal causes of fear in your child and about its connection with other feelings.

You can complete the portrait of fear in the following way. Tell your child in confidence that you know what all fears are afraid of - they are afraid of becoming a laughingstock! They hate when people make fun of them. Then solemnly condemn the child's fear to ridicule. "Kara" can be done in several ways. For example, to draw funny details on the image of fear - bows, pigtails, ridiculous hats, etc. You can redraw the drawing by making a new plot in which the same fear falls into an absurd situation, for example, falls into a puddle, and is very embarrassed about it.

Note. If, despite all your efforts, the child does not want to draw his own fears, then use the following game. It is suitable for both children who experience too much fear, and children who are ashamed of this emotion and try to cope with it.

"An identikit of fear"

Ask your child if he knows what an identikit is. Surely he heard that this is a portrait of a person drawn by an artist (or created on a computer). Its peculiarity is that the artist himself never saw his character, but painted a portrait from the words of eyewitnesses. Why do we need such portraits? Your child may guess (or know for sure) that they are used, as a rule, in order to find the criminal.

The fear of a child can also be called a criminal, since it interfered with his quiet life (or sweet sleep), for example, last night (or remember another date). But then the troublemaker disappeared (after all, the child does not currently experience acute fear). We need to find it and neutralize it! To do this, imagine that a child comes to the police and writes a statement about the missing wretch. He is asked in detail about all the signs of fear. In the course of the story, an adult (that is, a policeman) draws an identikit. Periodically ask your child something like: "Didn't this fear have a red mustache?" - and in parallel paint on the mustache in the figure. When the child explains to you that there were no such signs, then erase the mustache.

Note. The more funny details you will assume in the image, the better. However, try to keep the gaming seriousness, because in fact you are now influencing inner world child. And only he himself has the right to laugh at his fears. So stay focused "guardian of the law", let your child laugh at what is happening and at your dullness.

"Fear and the Sculptor"

This game will be especially useful for a child if, in the course of previous games and conversations, you noticed that his feeling of fear is associated with other strong feelings, such as anger and anger. Here he will get the opportunity for emotional discharge.

Tell your child a short story that you will then act out. For example, such.

"The sculptor Denny lived in the same city. He was a real master and sought to perpetuate in sculpture everything that he saw around. His collection had completely different images - and the most lovely girls cities, and weak old people, and evil trolls, who, according to legend, inhabited the forest outside the city. As soon as he met new image, then immediately tried to embody it in stone or plaster. But such images became less and less.

And then one day he was sitting, thinking, in his workshop. Twilight was getting darker. The sky was getting dark and ominous. Danny's heart was full of doubts and worries. And suddenly he felt that fear took possession of his heart. He was so strong that he threatened to escalate into horror. Danny got up and wanted to run away, but he realized that he would be even more scared on the street.

They say fear has big eyes. And so it began to seem to Danny that in the dark corner of the workshop he saw shiny eyes terrible monster. "Who are you?" - barely exhaled frightened Danny. There was a terrible roar in the silence. Then the answer was heard: "I am your fear, great and invincible!" The sculptor was dumbfounded with horror. It looked like he was about to lose consciousness.

But suddenly an interesting thought came into his head - maybe to fashion this fear out of clay? After all, such a terrible image has never been in his collection! Then he plucked up courage and asked: "Mr. Fear, have you ever posed for an artist?" The fear was completely gone. "What?" he asked. "Before you finally take over my mind, let me mold you out of clay so that everyone will be afraid of you and recognize you," the master suggested. The monster did not expect such a turn of events and mumbled: "Well, go ahead, just hurry!" Work has begun. Danny took the clay and set to work. Now he was collected and focused again.

Since it was getting dark, we had to turn on the light. Imagine Danny's surprise when he was able to get a better look at the monster. It wasn't even a monster, but rather a small monster, puny, as if he hadn't eaten in a week. Fear shivered a little at that; he must have guessed Denny's thoughts. And the master shouted at him: "Don't twitch, otherwise the sculpture will come out!" Fear obeyed.

Finally the sculpture was ready. And Danny suddenly realized that he was not at all afraid of this monster, his fear suddenly became not terrible. He looked at the monster huddled in the corner and asked: "Well, what are we going to do?" The Scarecrow also realized that he was no longer afraid of him here. He sniffed and said: "Yes, I'll go, I guess." "Why did you come?" Danny asked. "Yes, it became boring alone!" - answered the monster. So they parted. And Denny's collection was replenished with a new unusual sculpture. Everyone around was surprised at her originality, and Danny looked at his creation and thought that skillful hands yes clever mind cope with such horrors."

After you tell this legend, talk with the child, find out if he liked it, what surprised him, pleased him, upset him?

If the child is not too tired after that, then you can immediately proceed to the second stage of work - playing out the story. If fatigue is felt, then it is better to do it the next day.

Let the child be the master. Start reading this fairy tale again (it is possible with abbreviations), and the child will try to portray everything he hears about. When you get to the monster spawning in the workshop, try dimming the lights. Then, when the sculpture begins, you turn it back on, and the child will mold the image of fear from plasticine, as he imagines it.

Note. The description of this game is quite long, but it's worth it. After all, here, in a single harmonious action, several ways of influencing the child's psyche are combined in order to eliminate fear. The story itself is a typical psychotherapeutic fairy tale. Pay attention to how the listener's attitude to what is happening changes in it: from the peak climax of fear and drama of the story to ridicule and even sympathy. When a child plays the role of a master in this scene, this is also the use of a psychotherapeutic technique. And finally, he sculpts a sculpture of his fear from plasticine, and this is the third way of correction, when the child creates a visual image of a feeling, gets the opportunity to control and change it. So do not take the time and effort for such complex psychotherapeutic games. By the way, you can also come up with similar simple stories as a plot to repeat the game at another time.

"screen test"

This is a universal game that can be used to solve many problems. Here we will look at how to help a child overcome their fears using this game.

Help your child imagine trying their hand at acting. The screenwriter (that is, you) will now introduce him to the plot of the future film. Then the young artist will try to reproduce the action. If other people besides him should take part in it, then he can either play for them himself, or use dolls or some kind of toys.

But in inventing stories, you have to be creative. It should be based on a story that really happened to the child and caused him fear, or an event that is not in the life experience of your son or daughter, but nevertheless the child is afraid of him. If, for example, your child is afraid of getting lost in a crowded place, then you can play such a scene.

Mom and son (daughter) went to the store. In a huge department store, the mother stared at the window, and the child stopped near the toy she liked. So they lost sight of each other. Mom was very worried about her baby, she began to rush around the store in search of him. At first, the child was also confused, even wanted to cry, but then he thought that this would hardly help him find his mother. Then he approached the seller and said that he was lost. The salesperson asked his name and made an announcement over the speakerphone. "Attention, attention! - said the announcer. - The boy Roma (the girl of Light) has lost his mother and is waiting for her in the jewelry department." An excited woman ran to this department in just a minute. She was in a panic. And what did she see? The kid calmly waited for her, examining the jewelry. She hugged her son (daughter) and burst into tears. The child began to console his mother that nothing terrible had happened, and the seller told her how calmly and boldly her son behaved. Mom was very proud of her child, because he behaved just like an adult.

Let your child play the role, in fact, of himself, and you can act as his absent-minded mother. Then try not to skimp on enthusiasm and a sense of pride in the finale of the story, let the child feel such a reward in the game, so that later he can strive for it in real life.

The same fear of getting lost can be "played out" in a scene where your child will help a lost baby, that is, initially play a hero. You can take a small doll for the role of a crying baby. So your son or daughter will more easily feel responsible for the younger and their advantage in the possibilities of self-control and search for a solution.

You can come up with similar everyday stories yourself to use with your child to deal with his real (not fictional) fears.

Note. With the help of this game, you can also implement the so-called prevention of the problem, since, playing a role in a scene you have invented, the child learns one or another strategy of behavior in a difficult situation. Therefore, if he suddenly finds himself really in it, then it will be easier for him to behave the way he once did, although in a game version.

Galina Sustretova
Dealing with fears in children

Outline plan educational activities

Topic: Work educational psychologist with fears in children senior preschool age senior group MB DOU CRR 33

Target: to help older preschool children cope with fears that interfere with their normal emotional well-being and communication with peers, the development of creativity.

Tasks:

Development of attention, imagination and coordination of movements;

Removal of psycho-emotional stress;

Building self-confidence;

Development of emotional and expressive movements;

Withdrawal fear of closed spaces, darkness, state of anxiety;

Development and improvement of communication skills;

Regulation of behavior in the team;

Prevention of aggression.

Materials and equipment: music center, recordings with calm, relaxing and active music, drawings of fairy-tale characters, paper, paints, brushes, tubes for juice, paper napkins and plates (with a blue and yellow bottom, a bedspread, a stick (pomelo, a circle cut out of paper, sports tunnel, arches, candy bag.

Introduction:

The teacher-psychologist informs the children that they will have an interesting, but difficult Work. Before we start the main educational activity, let's tune our body to work.

Work on self-regulation:

Imagine that in your left hand is clamped whole lemon. Squeeze it hard, try to squeeze all the juice out of it. Then slowly relax. Now take another lemon and squeeze it, try to squeeze it even harder than the previous one, like this very hard and slowly release it. Feel the relaxation. See how good you feel when you are relaxed. Now take the lemon in your other hand and squeeze out all the juice from it, do not leave a single drop. Press very hard. Do the same with another lemon.

Imagine that you have a hard (strong) chewing gum that is difficult to chew. Try to bite her (chew) strongly, strongly, let the neck muscles help you, then relax. Try to bite again, squeeze the gum between your teeth and relax again. The exercise is repeated 2-3 times.

And now an annoying fly arrives, and sit on your nose, try to get rid of it without using your hands. Wrinkle your nose, lift it up, strain it - collect it in wrinkles - relax your whole face. Notice when the nose tenses, the whole face tenses, and when the nose relaxes, the whole face also relaxes.

At the end of self-regulation, children are offered anew "blind face"- children run their hands along the edge of the face; "shape eyebrows"- run your fingertips along the eyebrows; "make eyes"- touch eyelids with fingertips index finger around the eyes, blinking eyes; "putting noses"- spend the index finger from the bridge of the nose down the wings of the nose; "mold ears"- pinch the earlobes, stroke the ears; "sculpt a chin". pronounce chorus: "I am good, kind, beautiful", stroke themselves on the head, face and hug themselves with both hands.

Main part:

The teacher-psychologist invites the children to sit at the tables and draw their own fears.

“Drawing of a blot-monster. Turns on scary music. Children on blank sheets of paper, using the blot method, depict their fears, and then painting on bows, flowers, using tubules for juice, turn terrible a blot in a cheerful and beautiful.

The game "Chants - whispers - silent".

The teacher-psychologist invites children to play and check how attentive they can be.

Instruction: you need to carefully follow the pictures shown by the teacher- psychologist: If you see a portrait of Baba Yaga, you can jump, run and scream, if you see a goldfish, you can only whisper, and if you see a portrait of the beautiful Vasilisa, you need to freeze in place and shut up. The psychologist shows portraits, the children follow the instructions.

After the game, the psychologist shows the children a bird that flew to them to tell them that Baba Yaga is flying here and wants to catch you. The teacher-psychologist invites children to outsmart Baba Yaga.

Exercise-game "Flower"

Calm music is on. The teacher-psychologist invites the children to stand in a circle as close as possible to each other, hold hands, bend over, stretch their hands in a circle down and forward - and here we are a flower bud. We will open up: handles-petals, backs - stems. Slowly we straighten up, smoothly, easily raise our hands up, lean back back, take the handles back to the sides gently, gently. The back is soft, the handles are soft. The breeze blew - we swayed left, right, handles left and right. Only the feet stand firm. Above the body, the whole body is free, soft. And then there is a noise outside the door. Baba Yaga runs into the hall with a broomstick in her hands, looks first to the right, then to the left, looking for children who to grab? Here the Baba Yaga sensed something and began to circle around the flower. We all slowly lean forward together again, the flower has closed, Baba Yaga will not find us. 2 times the bud closes and opens. And Baba Yaga is looking for us, getting angry, jumping. Every now and then it stops, freezes, listens, is about to teach us. Jumping again. Frozen again listening: where is the tramp, where are we hiding? Here Baba Yaga turns to the table, barely moving, moving little, little, afraid to frighten us. Throws herself to a chair, falls to the floor, hands run under chair: "Stop! And there is no one there. Baba Yaga jumps up again, freezes again, sneaks back, backs away. "Groh!"- under another chair, "Stop!"- and there is no one there either (3 times stirring-freezing). Baba Yaga never found anyone. She began to stomp her feet in anger. Nasty kids, here I am! The Baba Yaga dispersed, stamping her feet harder and harder, faster, faster. Now everything is slower and slower. Whoo! - Baba Yaga was tired, fell on a chair, her arms and legs hung like pasta: Baba Yaga is tired of searching and getting angry. She lay down on a chair and whimpered. So you need it, evil Baba Yaga. Psychologist says children: “Guys, look what a Baba Yaga is unfortunate, pathetic and, in my opinion, not at all terrible. Psychologist: “Guys, let's play with her! Baba Yaga, do you agree to play with us? Baba Yaga is delighted with such an offer.

The game "Baba Yaga". Baba Yaga stands in the center of the circle cut out of paper. Children run around and tease: “Baba Yaga is a bone leg. She fell off the stove, broke her leg, went into the garden, frightened the people. I ran to the bathhouse, scared the bunny. Baba Yaga jumps from the circle on one leg and tries "broom" tarnish children. Whoever it touches freezes in place, the game continues until all the children are stained.

The game "Do not rush". Children sit on chairs. At a distance of 5-6 steps from them, a chair is placed on which the Baba Yaga sits. Children take turns coming (do not run) to the chair, go around it and, slowly, return to their place. After everyone goes around the chair, the task is given to walk with their backs.

The game "Who is brave". A sports tunnel is installed on the carpet, large and small arches, which are covered with a blanket from above. Children, getting on all fours, take turns crawling inside these obstacles and returning to the start. At the same time, Baba Yaga is missing children by the legs, clothes, trying to suspend them.

After the game Baba Yaga praises children for their courage, dexterity and gives children "magic candy" that will make the guys brave and strong forever. And the guys, in turn, give Baba Yaga their drawings. Baba Yaga tells the children that all of them fears takes them with him to the forest and the children will never meet them again. Baba Yaga says goodbye and leaves.

Final part:

Relaxation "Journey to the Magical Forest"

The teacher-psychologist offers children after such a difficult work relax. Lie down comfortably, close your eyes and listen to my voice. Breathe slowly and easily. Imagine that you are in a forest where there are many trees, shrubs, all kinds of flowers. In the thick of the forest there is a white stone bench, sit down on it. Listen for sounds. You hear the murmur of a forest spring, the voices of birds, the sound of a woodpecker, the rustling of grasses. Feel smells: the wet earth smells, the wind carries the smell of pines. Remember your feelings, feelings, take them with you when you return from a trip. May they be with you all day long.

ending work, the teacher-psychologist invites the children to take one glass pebble and if they liked playing today, then the pebble is placed in a plate with a yellow bottom, and if they didn’t like it, then with a blue one.